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Was that her intention? To kidnap me for however long and keep me in her hotel room? Or was this just coincidence? I replied saying I’d be there in ten minutes, grabbing my keys, switching the computer off and running out the door. My palms started to sweat as I locked the door behind me, wondering how she’d react to me. As I drove to the diner, I tried calming myself down, telling myself that even if it led nowhere, you still get to meet a beautiful woman, and who knows, you may get to touch her. I wasn’t sure what to expect as I pulled up, parking next to one of the three other vacated cars in the parking lot. I got out slowly, wondering if she was watching me from somewhere, biding her time. I walked inside, blinking against the darker lighting, trying to get accustomed to the sudden dimness. A waitress came up and asked if it was just me and I replied no, I was meeting this girl here. No more than a moment after I finished saying those words did I feel a light tap on my. . I dunno, a grown-up I guess? A real person for once. A person who could throw a punch, and hurt somebody and be OK with that. It made me want to fuck and eat a cheeseburger in no particular order.Anyway since then Ethan has been looking a little.. I dunno man-boy to me. The shit I used to think was confidence now seems like lazyness, his bravado seems like dim-wittedness. I know he hasn't changed. It's the same him, the same shit, but I'm different now. It feels dissonant; frightening. Like I thought I knew what I wanted, and it wore a leather jacket and smelled like engine-oil and booze, and rode motorcycles with a devil-may-care attitude, and bent me over those motorcycles and fucked me with that same devil-may-care attitude. But now it all just seems a little... adolescent. Small. Ethan, me, all of it.So when he held on to my wrist with that shark-tooth grin, all fucking drunk and stanky, not letting me go until he got what he wanted.. I think I wanted to feel that again. I.
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